Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Facing your FEARS!

"Fear makes the wolf bigger than he is." ----German Proverb

Last October, after a small rain, I went to go pick Reid up from school. In order to miss the school zones and traffic between our house and his school, I would take Hueco Springs Loop (which eventually turns into River Road). For those of you not familiar with that route, it is your typical hill country back road, full of twists, turns and hills. I had my 2 youngest with me nicely buckled up in the backseat. Before I knew it, I was spinning out of control. After what seemed liked 4 or 5 complete circles (the police report only said 1 1/2), I hit several large oak trees and totaled my husband's car. Praise God, none of us were hurt. I am still a very nervous driver, especially when it rains. For the last 10 months I have avoided that road like the plague! But this morning, the time had come. In order to arrive to school on time, I had to take the dreaded route! So, with clutched hands on the wheel I made the left turn and headed down the road. My 4 year old chimes in from the backseat, "Momma, you're going to crash the car again." I assured him that I was going to be VERY CAREFUL and that we would be fine. Poor little guy, I think I've scarred him for life. I was quite nervous and drove only about 25MPH. ( I apologize if you were one of the 3 cars behind me.) When I finally came to the red light and the loop, I breathed a big sigh of relief. I had made it! YEA! My hands ached (from squeezing the steering wheel so tight) and my heart was pounding, but I was so proud of myself for facing that fear.

I remember another "fear" I had to face about 8 years ago. The fear to start scrapbooking. That may sound crazy, but I was really nervous about getting started. I thought, I will never catch up. My oldest was almost 2 and I had a baby due in a few months. How would I ever get it all done? My sister kept insisting that it wasn't about staying "caught" up. So, I finally started with my newest roll of film. (before we all went digital!) At first I did so good. Ever time I got a roll developed, I would get all the pictures scrapped before it was time to develop another roll. Well, 4 more kids and a tub full of pictures later, I am so behind it's not even funny!

My sister was right, that's not what scrapbooking is all about. To me it's about preserving memories in a way far more special than just sliding them into a plastic sleeve in a photo album. When I scrapbook, I want my boys to be able to look back on the pictures and relive the event just like it happened yesterday. I want them to be able to read journaling that lets them know exactly what my thoughts or even their thoughts were at the time. I want them to be able to look back, enjoy, and know how much they mean to me. That is why I scrapbook. Will I ever catch up? Maybe. Does that matter. NO.

I did a layout yesterday from the JDRF Walk last October. I was supposed to be cleaning out my stuff and came across some paper I bought at Scrapbook Haus the day it opened! I enjoyed getting to think back to that day and the good time that we had. I also enjoyed getting to use some of the goodies that I had bought almost a year ago. It's so hard for me to believe a year has almost passed. I can't wait to see what the Haus has in store for the birthday celebration! Stay tuned, as soon as I know, I will let you know! (paper used - Moxxie)

So, what fear do you need to face? Remember, "the only thing we have to fear is fear itself". --FDR - First Inaugural Address, March 4, 1933

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